Parent

Girls More at Risk for Behavioral Problems if Mom Doesn’t Work Outside the Home

July 10, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

It’s an argument as old as dirt. Kids need two parents, with one of them staying home to take care of kids and the house. Healthier, more well-adjusted people come from homes where one parent takes care of the home and the kids. Well-behaved children come from homes where one parent raises themand the other works.

Wrong. Many studies have been conducted in the last several decades, and the information coming out is that the old school of thought is valueless.

The study was published in the 2010 Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health. Senior researcher at University College London, Anne McMunn, PhD, reports that there are no detrimental child’s behavior associated with the mother working outside the home.

Girls are More in Danger of Behavior Problems

In fact, the studies strongly suggest that children in homes with two working parentsseem to fare the best. However, the studies also suggest that for some reason, girls are twice as likely to have behavioral problems at age 5 if the mother stays home. No such effect has been discovered for boys.

McMunn said that working mothers should not feel guilty leaving their kids to work. Mothers worry about the emotional development of their children, when in actuality, they’re doing their kids a service by working outside the home, in regards to additional income for the family and positive effects on the children.

The latest study looked at information when the children were infants, when they were three and again at five years of age. It’s a UK study, but children are children, and the study results are likely in any country.

Filed Under: Family Support, Parenting Tagged With: Behavior, Parent, University College London

Are you a bad parent?

April 24, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

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Every parent would like to believe that they are doing their very best for their child. However, sometimes, even you best isn’t enough. A child deserved good nutrition, education, a safe environment and a morally sound upbringing among other things. Even though you may not excess at all these things, this doesn’t imply that you are a bad parent!

However, there is a certain kind of behavior that is completely against the tenets of good parenting. Here are some things you should absolutely avoid in order to be a good parent:

Physically abusing your child is a criminal offence. While parents do ‘spank’ there children to discipline them, this should never be with such intensity that it causes unbearable pain or trauma.
Never use foul language against your children. Verbally abusing them can have a bad psychological affect on the child, not to mention that you will be setting a poor model to follow!
Don’t ever reprimand your kids in front of others as this causes humiliation that can lead them to lose their self-esteem.
Don’t complain about your child to others, especially when the child is around as this also causes a lot of embarrassment to the child is not constructive in any way.
Comparison with other children is not a great way to encourage your child to behave better, it will only make them feel unloved and degraded.
Never fight with your spouse or anyone else in front of your children as this sets a bad precedent. It is important for children to believe their parents love each other.
If your kids see you lying, they will do it too!

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Divorce, Family, Parent

Preparing for Motherhood

March 19, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

There is a lot of preparation that goes into becoming a mom. Just because you have a baby doesn’t mean you can become a mom. Being a mom is almost an art. It takes talent and skill. You can begin preparing for becoming a mom before you are even pregnant with your first child.

If you are going to become a parent, it is a lot easier when you are settled down before you become pregnant. Find a place to live and a steady job before you try for your first child. Make sure that you have a steady income to be able to take care of your child. Make sure your life is easy for you at the time before you try to get pregnant. A child is a lot of work and you have to know that you can handle it.

Know what type of mother you want to be. Take note of the women around you that are mothers. Know how you want to treat your children and how you aren’t going to treat them. If you set these goals now, you will be able to follow them once you have your first child.

Once you become pregnant, prepare for the coming of your child by making a room for them, buying necessary items, and know what to do before they arrive. It’s always good to take classes for your first child so that you can prepare before they arrive.

It takes a lot of preparation to have a child, but even more to become a mom. Learn what you can do to give your child the best life. Being a mom takes years of preparation, not just nine months.

Filed Under: Family Support, Parenting Tagged With: Child, Mother, Parent

How to Brighten Your Child’s Day

March 12, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

There are a thousand things that can go wrong in your child’s day. What if they trip getting on the bus? What if they get bullied during recess? What if they get sick during school? What if they just have a bad day? You may worry about your child a lot and count how many things could go wrong in one day, but there are plenty of things you can do to help may your child’s day just a little bit better.

Be there before they leave for school and help them get ready. You can help by making sure they have all their homework together, helping them not forget anything, and even cooking them breakfast. Even if your child is old enough to make their own breakfast, it will save them time if you are able to make breakfast for them before they leave for school.

Leave them notes in their backpacks or pockets. This way, when they find it, they will at least crack a smile knowing you are thinking of them. It’s always nice to receive an unexpected note from someone who you know loves you.

Talk to them when they get home from school and you get home from work. Make sure they had a good day, and if they didn’t, try to spend a little extra time with them to help them feel better. You can do anything with them, just try to spend time with them.

It is hard to brighten your child’s day when you can’t be there all the time either because you need to work or they have to go to school or for both reasons. Try the subtle things to help brighten their day.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Breakfast, Child, Overtime (sports), Parent

Time to Yourself

March 5, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

As a mother, it is difficult to juggle your time between your children’s activities, work, and time for yourself. Once you become a mother, you don’t have the time that you used to have. Your children require much of your attention, but it’s okay to take a few hours a week for yourself.

If you need a break, try to set time aside for you and your husband to go out on a date every now and then. This doesn’t have to be that often, but it will give you both time to relax. You don’t have to take a long date, either. Just a few hours will give you time to talk to each other. Hire a babysitter for a few hours while you and your husband are out so you don’t have to worry about your children while you’re on your date.

Relax for a few hours watching a movie. It’s okay to take an hour or two every Friday night to have time to yourself in order to relax. Find a movie that you will enjoy and have fun with it. You may want to wait until your children are asleep so that you can have freedom while watching your movie.

Don’t be afraid to take a girl’s night out. Have someone watch your children for a few hours while you spend some time with your friends. You can do whatever you want, but try to do an activity that is relaxing and will get your mind off other things.

Everyone needs some time to himself or herself every once in a while. Just because your children need so much of your attention doesn’t mean that you have to stop giving yourself attention. There are plenty of other activities that you can do to relax. Find something that you enjoy doing and spend a few hours doing it.

Filed Under: Family Support Tagged With: Child, Every Friday, Parent

Financial Hardships are Great Times to Teach Budgeting Lessons to Children

February 25, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

When it comes to showing children about money and how to budget, many parents believe that just writing it down and showing their children is enough. While the importance of a budget can be conveyed to a child in writing, the best way to show children about budgeting and money is by example and budgeting and saving your own family’s money.

Many parents have stopped budgeting due to experiencing many financial woes and troubles. However, just because you’re going through some financial difficulties doesn’t mean that the budgeting and money lessons have to stop. In fact, financial hard times are some of the best times to show children the importance of budgeting. Here is a look at some ways that parents can show their children about budgeting and the importance of saving money during financial hard times.

Refinancing Option. Refinancing is a popular way to save money during financial hardships. Opportunities for a car refinance can allow parents to save money on the interest that they are paying on their current loan. While child might not be able understand all the concepts regarding refinancing a parent can explain in terms the child can understand what is happening and allow the child to see the importance of refinancing on the budget.

Clipping Coupons. Clipping coupons is a great way to save money. In fact, clipping coupons can be used regardless of if you’re facing financial hardship or if you have a perfectly planned budget. Parents can show children just how much money can be saved by taking advantage of sales, coupons and even double coupon opportunities.

Cutting Back. When families experience financial hardships they will often evaluate where savings are possible. They may look to refinance a mortgage to lower monthly costs. Sitting down with children and showing them how to write out a budget and see where things can be cut can help children see how cutting back can help the budget.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Budget, Parent

Preparing for Motherhood

January 4, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

For many parents, children were unexpected. In some families, the idea of having children was never even discussed. Just because you’re capable of conceiving children, does not mean you’re capable of being a good parent. So when you find out you are pregnant for the first time, what can you do to prepare that child to have a good mother?
When you look back on your childhood, you may ask yourself what you liked and disliked about how your parents brought you up. This may help you realize their reasoning behind why they did many things, and even though you didn’t like it at the time, you may want to treat your child similar, or completely the opposite. Before you have your child, decide how you are going to treat them and what will benefit them the most. Consider what you can do to give them the best life.
Prepare yourself for common motherly tasks while you are pregnant with your child. For example, you may want to take certain classes, such as an introduction class to taking care of your child, or cooking classes. You will get better at tasks such as cooking and cleaning as you and your child grow together, but try to get in these habits, such as cleaning, early.
Show your child you love them even before they are born. A great example is to create a scrapbook of your pregnancy. You can take pictures of your belly and place them in a scrapbook. You can write journal entries about your pregnancy or keep tokens from hospital visits such as ultrasound pictures.
Try your best to sort out your life before the child is born. If you don’t have a job, try your hardest to get one. Find an apartment or a friend you get along with to live with if you are not married. This is one of the most difficult parts of preparing for your child’s birth. If you want to do your best as a mother, make sure your child will grow up in a stable home.

Filed Under: Family Support Tagged With: Parent

Empathetic Parenting: Three to Four-Years Old

December 19, 2010 By admin Leave a Comment

All three to four year olds are special and may develop at different rates, but generally this is the age when understanding develops, potty training occurs, and language skills surface. It’s the window when your baby has grown into childhood, so the rules of parenting have shifted.

Most children at this age have vivid imaginations, so it’s important to foster that imagination. Reading to your child every night is a great way to influence creative development as well as root a love of reading that will be vital in later years. Children of this age love to dance, sing, and draw. Teach them simple rhymes and talk about the story behind their drawing. Always be encouraging and show interest.

Some three and four-year olds may have fears, such as being afraid of the dark, and they might be shy when it comes to trying new things or meeting new people. It’s important to empathize with such worries. Don’t be forceful in trying to make your child deal with the dark alone. Maybe you had to have a nightlight too at that age, so talk about it with your child. Make a game out of checking the room out for monsters before bed. This is the age when they develop a sense of humor and silliness, so use that to your advantage!

Language is a huge development during this stage, and your child will get words confused, mixed up, or just plain wrong. Always respond positively to a child’s effort with language, and don’t bother with correction. Model proper use of language and they will eventually pick up on it.

Help your child develop independence by giving him freedom during playtime. Supervise him riding a tricycle but don’t jump up right away if he gets a wheel stuck. Allow him time to try and work out the problem for himself. This builds confidence.

Always be mindful of empathetic parenting, no matter the child’s age.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Family, Home, Parent, Toilet training

Empathetic Parenting: Age Seven and Eight

December 16, 2010 By admin Leave a Comment

A child that got along so well with classmates at age six is probably picking fights with his closest friends by age seven or eight. This is the age when friendships start to form. It’s a natural human development that can be emotionally harmful when bullying is allowed to occur, so supervising your child’s playtime is vital.

Make sure you have talked to your child about how everyone is different, and differences aren’t a bad thing. Unfortunately, not all parents instill this attitude in their children, so yours will almost certainly encounter a bully by this age. Not all children are aware they’re being bullied, so don’t make a big deal out of it if your child seems to shrug it off.

Bed-wetting accidents may be a problem. Put yourself in your child’s shoes and understand her shame and embarrassment, and don’t blow the incident out of proportion. If you’re tired and grumbling about having to change their sheets in the middle of the night, she will feel guilty about it. Provide solutions to problems like these, such as nighttime disposable underwear.

At this age, a child begins to worry about lots of things. They’ll pick up on school problems, when their parents argue, and when their best friends sit next to someone else at lunchtime. It’s important to have a clear line of communication between you and your child so he or she will open up to you about these types of concerns.

By this age, kids should be well aware of consequences, so be consistent with discipline. If your child refuses to go into Time-Out for a bad behavior, take away a privilege (such as a favorite toy) until they have served their time.

This is also the perfect age to begin a family game night. Allowing your child to pick a board game to play with you will encourage independent thinking, a sense of ownership, and family socialization.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Bullying, Child, Parent

Empathetic Parenting: Ages Thirteen to Fourteen

December 10, 2010 By admin Leave a Comment

By ages thirteen and fourteen, hormones have already kick-started puberty. It’s important to have open and honest communication with your child during these years, since this can be the most confusing and complicated stage of a lifetime.

At this age, it’s normal for girls to have started menstruating, growing pubic hair, and seeing breast development. For boys, they’ll see testicular growth along with pubic hair, voice changes, and wet dreams. It’s perfectly normal if they experiment with masturbation. This may be an uncomfortable subject for you to discuss, but it’s important for them to understand that masturbation is natural. Talk to them about when and where masturbation is appropriate and be patient. Your teen is more likely to open up about it if you discuss it calmly and are well prepared and show no embarrassment yourself. This open communication will keep your teen from experiencing any unnecessary guilt or shame that can come from their isolated struggle with his or her body.

This is also the age when kids are easily influenced by peers. They generally seek out like-minded friends who share similar beliefs and values to their own families, but inevitably they will be influenced to try risky behaviors such as smoking, drinking, drugs, or sex. The more you have talked to your child about these behaviors beforehand, the more likely they will stand up for their own values.

If you haven’t instilled in them a good sense of healthy eating, now is the time eating problems arise. They’re more likely to find television or video games entertaining instead of outdoor activities, but encourage the latter.

Show an interest in your teen’s social life and get to know their friends. Respect his or her opinions and discuss your own views in an adult manner. You’re raising an individual after all, not a carbon copy of yourself. Make your own expectations clear, but be proud of your teen’s individuality.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Adolescence, Masturbation, Parent, Puberty, Pubic hair

Girls More at Risk for Behavioral Problems if Mom Doesn’t Work Outside the Home

Are you a bad parent?

Preparing for Motherhood

How to Brighten Your Child’s Day

Time to Yourself

Financial Hardships are Great Times to Teach Budgeting Lessons to Children

Preparing for Motherhood

Empathetic Parenting: Three to Four-Years Old

Empathetic Parenting: Age Seven and Eight

Empathetic Parenting: Ages Thirteen to Fourteen

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